Raw berry cashew cream mini tarts

Monday morning! That was always a tough one for me because it meant going to work that I was not so crazy about. In these last 11 years since I finished university and started working, I had quite a few different jobs, from PR & Marketing to PA & Admin to Accounting & other… and to be totally honest with you, I’ve never enjoyed any of them. I believe I did well in what I used to do and was always dedicated and responsible in my work but those jobs just didn’t make me feel good about myself and I was always feeling like I’m missing out on something. Like I should be doing something else but just didn’t know what that something else was… And it also meant that most of the mornings I was going to work with a knot in my stomach. Not a best way to start your day, right!?

I admire some food photographers and bloggers (like amazing Tieghan from Halfbaked harvest blog or equally amazing Izy from Top with cinnamon blog) that already from their very young age (like before turning 20!!!) knew exactly what they wanted to do and started their food photography/blogging journey.
I wish I was the same but my journey was different and probably it had to be that way. All those jobs and experiences taught me something and brought some good life lessons. It’s interesting how sometimes life throws something difficult your way and than it turns out to be a life changing experience. That’s kind of what happened to me three years ago when I lived in Kazakhstan because of my husband’s work and for the first time in life found myself in an environment where I couldn’t work. At the beginning I was feeling so useless and had quite a lot of negativity going on and it was difficult to stand up in the mornings, specially when the temperatures were like -45 C. And not to mention those questions from people like “what do you do all day?”. Those didn’t help. So I quickly understood that I have to start doing something to feel better about myself. So at first I started learning Russian and that was fine for a while but than it was not enough, I needed and wanted to do more. After talking with my husband one cold winter evening in Astana, he asked me “what would you like to do if there were no limitations and if you could do something that would truly make you happy, what would that be?” and I answered without thinking “photography”! Because that was something I always enjoyed doing and could spend hours outside taking photos with my basic little digital camera.

After that straightforward answer, immediately followed the doubt, the fear, the lack of confidence. And all the questions like “I’m over 30, isn’t it too late to learn a new skill?”, “but photography is so technical and I am so not technical person, how can I learn that?”, “but we are living in the middle of the Central-Asian steppe, how can I possibly learn photography here?” and so on…you get the picture.
But once I knew in my heart that I want to at least try rather than always wonder what would have been if I tried, I started to change my life for the better. I enrolled in an online photography school based in London (the Photography institute), started from scratch by switching my camera from auto to manual, doing the assignments, than investing in better camera, practicing, practicing and some more practicing and bit by bit suddenly all those technical pieces started to make sense and I could start to enjoy the creative process. When the time came for the final assignment, I chose Food photography even if I knew nothing about it besides that I loved food! So that was it. 🙂 It’s understatement to say I became obsessed ha ha! I just found something that feels good doing and that I can do without that knot in the stomach. Something I LOVE doing! The best feeling ever… So if there is something you would like to do or change but you are afraid of or you doubt yourself, just do it!!! The worst thing it could happen is that it doesn’t work out but than at least you’ll know that you tried…
So to finish this story and as I continue my journey, I just want to say to each and every one of you that are following me on this blog and my social media pages, thank you, thank you, thank you! Every kind comment, message and like means a lot to me. 🙂
I hope you are still here lol! 😀 Now the recipe…
I found this recipe in one Croatian food magazine and it’s by Mihaela Devescovi, author of Raw food book. Raw desserts are really delicious and good for our bodies so I’m enjoying trying more of them. They are also easy to make and quite rich so you only need a smaller piece to satisfy your sweet tooth.